By: Emily Weber
Chris Rock though. This opening made me laugh, it made me cry. So smart and so on point.
Best Screen Play: Spotlight
J: I do not care.
Best Adapted Screen play winner: The Big Short.
J: The Big Short
C: The Big Short. For all the creative devices used.
E: Room. For not making a child narrator cheesy.
Best Supporting Actress: Alicia Vikander— and she takes the award with a bomb dress.
C: Kate Winslet
E: Joanna Hoffman for being a #BossBitch. Or Kate Winslet for playing her in Steve Jobs.
Costume Design: Mad Max
C: Mad Max.
E: Carol. Having not seen Mad Max, when the costume designer got up and said #ItCouldHappen my heart stopped. I don’t know what this film is about, but seeing the trailer, I hope it could not.
Production Design: Mad Max.
J: Carol. Totally immersive.
C: Mad Max
Bridge of Spies was awful, IMO. I hope it wins zero awards.
E: How is there a category for Hairstyling but not for Stunts? Let’s get this straight Oscars 2017.
C: There, there Bernice del Toro. #TooDrunkForThisShit
Cinematography: The Revenant
C: Sciario. My only complaint about the Revenant is that it could have been more welly-lit 😉
E: I don’t see these kinds of films.
C: We probably shouldn’t even use film, we should just use cave paintings. Don’t light anything. Don’t even use a camera.
Best Editing: Mad Max
E: My ballot has won every award so far. Thanks Gold Derby.
THE MINIONS AREN’T EVEN NOMINATED FOR ANYTHING. WHY ARE THEY HERE.
J: Han Solo has known Chewy for 50 years and he’s never once wanted to try the cross bow before?
To wrap up Part I: Getting through the first stage of awards… is taking a few bottles of champagne.